Culture Clash Resolved: Art loves Football

Throughout the ages the realms of creative expression and athletic prowess have only shared fleeting glances at one another. For the most part, clinic or at least according to sitcom legend, the artsy fartsy types rarely appreciate the jocks and the jocks pound the artists with the sort of pent-up rage that stems from an inability on their own part to express themselves without violence.  These are the cliches of truth.


But now that’s all changed. Times, they are a changing. Here is a fantastic account of some high stakes wagering between the directors of the Indianapolis Museum of Art (Max Anderson) and the New Orleans Museum of Art (E. John Bullard) Both teams have a pony in the upcoming Super Bowl between the Indianapolis Colts and the New Orleans Saints and neither man feels defeat is in their cities’ futures.

I suggest clicking away and reading the whole scoop, but here is my favorite from their exchange (after it had already heated up a bit – and they can’t decide what to wager):

“I am amused that Renoir is too sweet for Indianapolis. Does this mean that those Indiana corn farmers have simpler tastes? If so why would Max offer us that gaudy Chalice — just looks like another over-elaborate Victorian tchotchke. Let’s get serious. Each museum needs to offer an art work that they would really miss for three months. What would you like Max? A Monet, a Cassatt, a Picasso, a Miro? Sorry but we have no farm scenes or portraits of football players to send you.” – Bullard

They eventually settle on trading some piece of frilly awesome for some other piece pinky-up rad. The point is they got to temporarily jump out of their polite comfort zone and feel what it’s like to compete and trash talk and defend their city’s pride – much like professional athletes do on a weekly basis. No matter who wins (The Saints are going to win though, for the record) this fiery bout of territorial pride goes a long way in renewing the lost bond between physical ability and creative aspiration.

Now all we need is a Super Bowl between Israel and Palestine. Wait, what?

A Night at the Museum, sans Ben Stiller, add Free Beer


The Portland Art Museum is continuing their rabid pursuit of youth-oriented hi-jinks by assembling, refractionist with care and precision, Shine a Light: A Night at the Museum. A special event taking place on September 19th from 6pm until the stroke of midnight.

Here’s some words detailing the intricacies of the evening:

“The event consists of six hours of performances, installations, tours, workshops, and games by 15 artists drawn from Portland State University’s Art and Social Practice Program, led by Harrell Fletcher and Jen Delos Reyes. The Northwest Film Center joins in by breaking out of the Whitsell Auditorium to present vintage and contemporary works in some surprise locations. The projects are centered on artist and audience participation and visitors are encouraged to experience the Museum’s spaces and collections in new ways.”

In addition to official written intent provided by the higher-ups, here are some weapons you can use to tactically coerce friends to attend:

– Performances by E*Rock, Atole, Mirah, Joe Preston of the Thrones, Honey Owens of Valet, Christopher Doulgleri of Hooliganship, Alex Guy, Drew Slum and Blacque Butterfly.

– Free Beer! Not only ordinary beer or even ordinarily-awesome Portland beer. For the occasion there will be beer that has been inspired by art works in the Portland Art Museum’s collection. Brewed special for this one night from Laurelwood, Lompoc and Lucky Lab.

Basically the event is a composition and culmination of the most substantially gnarly aspects of Portland living (music, beer, galleries) and your absence on the occasion would be a white flag to the army of lameness. All of the festivities are free with museum admission.

Also! I’ll be slinging tickets for the duration, so you can complain directly to me if you feel bamboozled at night’s end.

More info here.

Portland Art Museum Offers Mindfuck Tutorial


The Portland Art Museum recently opened an exhibit called “Virtual Worlds: M.C. Escher and Paradox” which features a gallery filled to the brim with prints and drawings by Maurits Cornelis Escher (his best buds called him Mauk). He was one of the preeminent artists in the Dutch school of mindfuckery and flunked the second grade.  As renowned as he is, more about his talents are often ridiculed by pinky-finger-up artists and jerked-off to by mathemeticians. Both should be viewed as compliments.

Think back to grade school and the poster of the hand drawing the other hand.  Or remember David Bowie, case Jennifer Connelly and a baby crawling, sick chasing and dancing their way around a room that had upside down stairways and no north star. Remember this animal changing into that thing? Or that thing changing into this animal? That’s our boy Mauk!

He toyed with perspective, the process of change, the notion of infinity and our hearts. The exhibit runs through September 13th and is covered under the museum’s general admission price.

Muppet Muppet + More Muppet

The Northwest Film Center knows what the rest of us don’t. They know that in tumultuous times the masses need a rally cry. A man has to step up and remind us how life should be lived. We as a people need a moral compass. And that man should most assuredly be Jim Henson.

Before leaving he put together a prolific collection of media that laid siege to even the most hostile imaginations. The NW Filmcenter brings us “Muppets, nurse Music and Magic: Jim Henson’s Legacy” to celebrate these feats. It’s a retrospective featuring many favorites (Labyrinth, The Dark Crystal, The Muppet Movie) and a slew of lesser-known bits of gnarliness like Dog City (1940’s film noir populated by wise-cracking dogs).

Confused? Advanced tickets can be purchased online or day-of can be had a half-hour before showtime in the coat check at the side entrance of the Portland Art Museum (the museum’s Whitsell Auditorium host’s most of the Film Center’s screenings).  More info is clickable: Film Center.

Gauguin: GET SOME

The Portland Art Museum just nabbed a big, epilepsy
fat, juicy Gauguin. A fella named Melvin “Pete” Mark had the funny idea to be generous in these times of woe and he donated the museum an 1884 piece entitled: Vue d’un jardin, Rouen (Garden View, Rouen). It is now sitting pretty in the Impressionism collection on the first floor of the Jubitz Center for Modern and Contemporary Art. 

For ticket information and museum hours visit:

Gauguin: GET SOME.